Cockneys heading to the North Pole – You have to laugh | OneFootball

A ridiculous number of times in a row that Newcastle United fans had to travel away for cup matches.

Those drawing the balls out in the FA Cup and League Cup somehow managing to do even worse for NUFC than Bruno Guimaraes trying to win the toss at St James’ Park!

Then suddenly it has been all change.

Starting with the bizarre turn of events that ended up with AFC Wimbledon fans travelling ‘up’ from London for their ‘home’ League Cup match against Newcastle United, then Chelsea fans visiting St James’ Park in the next round, now Brentford fans doing the same.

I am always amused at how differently these matches are reported, especially those in midweek with the extra travelling issues, as disgracefully, public transport (trains!) can’t find a way to bend and accommodate the needs of so many football fans to get them home on the night of a match.

When you have away fans travelling ‘up’ from the likes of London for a night match at St James’ Park, when you hear them and the media talking about it, you would literally think that they were having to travel ‘up’, as in up Mount Everest, up the North Face of the Eiger, travelling up to the North Pole.

For Newcastle United fans going the opposite way, you would almost think it was literally a stroll ‘down’ to London (or Brighton, or Southampton, or Bournemouth…).

It almost seems like because Newcastle United fans have to do so many lengthy away trips, with a ridiculous number of them getting moved to daft times for TV, that because they are so frequent, NUFC fans should somehow then find it easier. A bit like how the media make out like we all go to St James’ Park topless every match, especially in the depths of winter.

Fair play to the small number (they have taken 1,200 tickets and last I saw, had yet to sell out) of Brentford fans travelling ‘up’ to the North Pole tonight but you have to laugh at some of the conversations between them, the same as when AFC Wimbledon fans and Chelsea fans visited ‘up’ to the far north on earlier nights. The way some go on, you would think it was a month long trek across a glacier, rather than a few hours on a train either way.

I don’t get away as much as I used to but the Newcastle United away support is second to none, the dedication of so many to get to every away game that they can, is outstanding.

Absolutely shocking the way the club have gone so over the top with punishments of losing all loyalty points and/or season tickets, if caught moving a ticket on if they can’t go, even if just giving it away or selling at face value.

I know it is a cup match tonight at Base Camp St James’ Park, however, worth a reminder of the distances Newcastle United fans are having to travel this season to Premier League away matches.

The 2024/25 Premier League clubs, number of miles round trip from Newcastle United / St James’ Park to each of the 19 stadiums:

288 miles – Man City

301 miles – Man U

340 miles – Nottingham Forest

352 miles – Everton

356 miles – Liverpool

360 miles – Leicester

420 miles – Aston Villa

440 miles – Wolves

546 miles – Arsenal

562 miles – Chelsea

562 miles – Fulham

566 miles – Tottenham

566 miles – West Ham

570 miles – Ipswich

582 miles – Crystal Palace

582 miles – Brentford

645 miles – Southampton

689 miles – Brighton

698 miles – Bournemouth

So a few bits of analysis from above.

Number of miles to go there and back from SJP to the 19 Newcastle United away games in 2024/25 Premier League – 9,425 miles

Average round trip – 496 miles

Number of round trips under 280 miles – None

Number of round trips less than 300 miles – One

Number of round trips less than 400 miles – Six

Number of round trips over 540 miles – Eleven!

As a comparison, this is what Brentford fans face for away games.

Obviously, for starters, the majority of PL away matches for them are in London, or within easy reach. Ten of their nineteen PL away trips, for example Ipswich is only a 160 mile round trip from London. Whilst Newcastle United fans, 288 miles round trip to Man City is the shortest, the only one below 300 miles!