Where do the (so-called) Premier League big six go from here? | OneFootball

In the less-than-truthful world of mass media, somewhere along the way, the “Premier League big four” became the “Premier League big six” thanks to the much-vaunted rise of Man City and Spurs.

Before that change there had been a right carve-up between Man Utd, Arsenal, Chelsea and Liverpool for nearly a decade.

A handful of interlopers, including Newcastle United under Sir Bobby Robson, had occasionally flattered to deceive. Leicester City achieved the improbable by winning the whole shebang in 2015-16, while Everton pulled off the seemingly impossible by finishing fourth in 2004-05, ahead of their neighbours across Stanley Park, yet boasted a goal difference of minus one and a grand total of 61 points from 38 matches. Mind, that was a whole point more than Liverpool clocked up in the previous season, when they were fourth.

Enough history for now. Let’s consider the near future, specifically what the Sick Six (yes, ladies and gentlemen, I too can be down with the kids when needs must) will do next season.

We’ve had the all-too-predictable forecasts from the flock of sheep on television and radio wrongly known as pundits. They stick together because there’s strength in numbers. And their apparently expert verdict is that the three “big” clubs who finished below us last month, Liverpool, Spurs and Chelsea, will bounce back with renewed power.

As Del Boy might have asked in his impeccable Franglais: “Poor car, Rodders?”

Why indeed?

I would suggest, looking at the Premier League table for the second half of last season, Aston Villa are more likely than either of those little clubs in London to mount a serious challenge for a Champions League berth. The Brummies gained nine points more than Spurs, 18 more than Chelsea over those 19 games. And they accrued one more than Liverpool, who according to their fawning friends in the media were on the greatest run since Red Rum overhauled Crisp in the 1973 Grand National. If you ever want to see triumph and disaster, Kipling’s two impostors, watch the video. It’s not one for faint hearts . . .

I don’t want to go to Chelsea but so many rentagobs seem convinced Pochettino is the panacea, I feel compelled to take it to the Bridge. Twelfth after 38 games, 44 points, minus nine goal difference. And one more statistic: they couldn’t hit a barn door with a banjo. Pochettino is a good manager (though Spurs fans who suffered when they finished third in a two-horse race in 2016 might disagree).

He will need to be so much more than good if he is to turn round that wayward bus full of disaffected, ill-matched and overrated misfits while working for a dysfunctional hierarchy “led” by Todd Boehly. And all in two seasons, the length of his contract. Poch might need most of that time just to learn the names of the players. On second thoughts, file Chelsea under sinking ship rather than wayward bus.

What of Spurs? Unburdened by European commitments, they will allegedly return to their rightful place at the top table and simultaneously send Newcastle United back whence they came. Before you can say Angelos Postecoglou, by all accounts.

This “European burden” is an interesting piece of logic, don’t you think? Places in Uefa competitions go to the most successful clubs. They are earned mainly by being consistently good over a long, hard season. Yet teams who finish eighth (Spurs) or 12th (Chelsea), clubs who have massively underachieved in a league where cash is almost always king, are somehow expected to rejoin the elite “just like that”, in the words of Tommy Cooper. Whoever said that was a clown.

Postecoglou will need to put a bit of Greek fire into Spurs from day one, especially if Harry One Of Our Own Kane walks away from the Naming Rights Here Stadium.

From what we saw at St James’ Park in a mis-match billed as a Champions League eliminator, they need a new keeper, a new defence and a new midfield. If they do lose their local hero they could always buy Lukaku, with Chelsea so keen to balance the books . . .

And so to Liverpool, the third team poised to “knock us off our effin’ perch”, to misquote old Purple Nose. They were the biggest and best team in England when I was a teenager. League champions, FA Cup winners, European Cup winners, helped by several former Newcastle United greats and managed by Bob Paisley, who was born in a small town in Co Durham (no, not that one). They would buy players such as Alan Kennedy and Terry McDermott for big money, then wait to unleash them.

They would on occasion buy a striker and convert him into a devastatingly effective midfield powerhouse. And they had speedy, tricky wide men. Yes, the NUFC of 2023 has more than one similarity to Liverpool in the Seventies.

But that was then and this is now. Liverpool need a rebuild. Van Dijk was a class act until T Rex Arms crippled him with a disgraceful and disgracefully unpunished challenge. Previously, the Dutch defender’s only weakness seemed to be a lack of concentration, which was no big deal when he could accelerate like a roadster to get himself out of trouble. My TV eyes tell me that pace has gone, probably never to return. Like Firmino. And Mane, who was their best first line of defence. Talking to Liverpool fans, they wished he had stayed and Salah had gone last summer. They have a top keeper and Alexander-Arnold might yet prove to be a midfield gem; he’s certainly no full-back. And neither is Nunez a £64m success story.

Liverpool are also, by finishing fifth, burdened with European commitments. Nothing novel in that, of course, but Thursday night / Sunday afternoon can mess with the rhythm of the season. Herr Klopp will deny the truth bis in alle Ewigkeit, but they have spent zillions more than Newcastle United in the past few years, so should be well-equipped for an arduous campaign at home and abroad. I don’t see them all singing from the same hymn sheet, however. They’ve been the biggest threat to Man City’s hegemony (money, money, money) in recent seasons but are they rising or falling next season? My fiver is on the latter, with a change of management less than 12 months away.

Well, that’s eliminated three of the “Premier League big six” from the competition to overtake the Magpies.

What of those who ended above us?

Last August I predicted we would finish ahead of Manchester United.

If we didn’t, I would be surprised and disappointed. We didn’t and I am. Luck played its part. Never, in the history of football, has the frame of the goal been so important. We were the unchallenged champions at missing the target by inches. Twenty-six (26) times in 38 Premier League games, with Villa next-best on 21.

Man Utd and Villa. I can see us being closer to Man City than either of them when next season is over. Villa could be the surprise package. McGinn is top class, as are Ramsey and Watkins. Martinez rarely errs. Would I swap them for four of our players? No, but I might if I were a fan of that small club in Salford.

So, how high can we fly? This contributor reckons second is realistic. Arsenal are a young team whom you would expect to be stronger and better next time. Their eight-point lead over Man City was in effect only two points, because City had two games in hand. The Gunners should not be mentally scarred by the experience. Alternatively, you could argue they will never have a better chance to win the title. And some of them might believe it. Liverpool, Spurs and Chelsea were not in the hunt, Man Utd were as unsteady as Wout Weghorst on a wonky ladder and even the champions lost home and away to Brentford. To overhaul Pep’s massed ranks looks a step too far by May 2024. After that, all bets are off.

Those lovable old pundits kept saying we overachieved in finishing fourth. Is that a case of damning with faint praise or is it a backhanded compliment? Maybe just an easy excuse for their failure to foresee our success. Whatever, Arsenal certainly overachieved in finishing second. And Man Utd overachieved in finishing third without a proper striker. Which just goes to prove . . . not much except that punditry is the epitome of money for old rope.