Rarely looked troubled by a deeply flawed bunch of misfits – Newcastle United 4 Manchester United 1 | OneFootball

Newcastle United hit top form at St James’ Park and rarely looked troubled by a deeply flawed bunch of misfits representing a club that claims to be one of the world’s biggest. Size isn’t everything.

While we started with the same line-up for a fifth successive match, the Salfords made five changes, most notably replacing one calamity keeper, Onana, with…another calamity keeper, Bayindir.

Heaton, the third-choice, must be wondering what he has done to upset the management when he cannot get a game.

Murphy almost scored in the first moments, hammering a shot from the right edge of the box only a foot wide of the far post with Bayindir beaten. What a start that would have been, though the opening quarter had few other highlights.

Zirkzee forced Pope into a top save from a rare attack after clever work by the inferior of the two Brunos. The Salfords, slowing the game down at every opportunity, seemed to be containing United. We undid them with a great pass from Isak that invited Tonali to smash the ball into the far corner on the volley. He didn’t hesitate.

That was the catalyst for a series of attacks that should have brought two more goals as the visitors continually lost possession, playing sloppy passes on the edge of their box. Bayindir made a great close-range parry as Isak looked for his 22nd league goal of the season.

When the Salfords did manage to attack with speed, they looked dangerous. Very much against the run of play they equalised through Garnacho, whose stabbed left-footer hit the inside of Pope’s far post and bounced into the net. Joelinton had lost the ball in midfield, with Dalot pouncing to put through the lightweight winger for what was his one positive contribution.

Trippier’s free-kicks and corners were disappointing, though his drilled pass into Isak had helped to set up our opener. The win we needed to claim fourth position in the Premier League was there for the taking. We just had to turn our superiority into goals. Was that what Tindall told his troops at half-time?

Normal service was resumed soon after the break.

Livramento’s excellent run down the left wing and low cross found Murphy beyond the far post. His first-time ball back into the six-yard box gave him yet another assist and Barnes a simple tap-in.

Zirkzee, who had looked useful at times, pulled up with a torn hamstring on 54 minutes at the end of a long cross-field run. He limped off, replaced by Hojland. Dorgu and Mount replaced Amass and Garnacho at the same time.

The scoreline looked a fairer reflection of the game on 64 minutes when Barnes swooped on a Mazraoui stumble in midfield, outpaced some feeble attempted tackles and curled a delicious right-footer into the corner of Bayindir’s net. A sweeter strike is hard to imagine.

Another great run on the left from the former Fox saw him cut into the box and earn a corner when for a moment his hat-trick had looked on.

United’s energy was running the Salfords ragged. They looked clueless, lacking in guile and spirit. Defenders slipped and stood on the ball, while the keeper became increasingly erratic.

That was emphasised on 77 minutes when Onana’s deputy played an intended out-ball straight at Joelinton 30 yards from goal. He headed it instantly to Bruno (the real one) who slammed it home at the Gallowgate End with Isak waiting in vain for a pass. Four-one to United by no means flattered the winners.

Wilson, Gordon and Krafth had been waiting to join the party. With the ball dead and the Salfords’ chances deader, the substitutes arrived, replacing Isak, Murphy and Trippier. Eminently sensible, little more than 72 hours before the Palace game would kick off.

In the closing minutes, Longstaff and Miley came on for Joelinton and Wor Bruno, who left the field to deafening cheers, somewhat different from the howls of derision that accompanied the visiting captain when he was replaced.

Hilariously, he was their best player, which is a bit like saying Eddie the Eagle was Britain’s best ski-jumper.

Liverpool are home and hosed unless they do a Devon Loch after jumping the last fence. The other form team as the season reaches its climax are the mighty Mags, who in truth are playing better than the champions-presumptive.

Special praise for Tonali, who again seemed to cover every blade of grass, and Livramento, out of position at left-back but disguising the fact brilliantly.

Assuming Eddie Howe watched the match, I can only hope he feels a whole lot better than when he was admitted to hospital on Friday. Our club is in safe hands, whoever is on the sick list.

What a team. Joelinton’s mates even managed to prevent him picking up a costly 10th booking as he was being substituted. Ugarte had clearly tried to provoke him but thankfully the South American tiff ended with no punishment.

Newcastle United 4 Manchester United 1 – Sunday 13 April 2025 4.30pm

Newcastle United:

Tonali 24, Barnes 49,64, Bruno 77

Garnacho 37

(In brackets the half-time stats)

Possession was Newcastle 48% (47%) Man U 52% (51%)

Total shots were Newcastle 12 (7) Man U 9 (4)

Shots on target were Newcastle 6 (2) Man U 5 (3)

Corners were Newcastle 7 (5) Man U 2 (1)

Touches in the box Newcastle 37 (18) Man U 12 (7)

Newcastle United team v Manchester United:

Pope, Trippier (Krafth 78), Schar, Burn, Livramento, Joelinton (Longstaff 85), Tonali, Bruno (Miley 85), Barnes, Isak (Wilson 78), Murphy (Gordon 78)

Dubravka, Targett, Osula, Neave

(Roy Keane on Newcastle United (and Man U…) – This is really good after 4-1 thrashing- Read HERE)