My Newcastle United – Why I loved Gabriel Obertan | OneFootball

Here at The Mag we have introduced a new feature, asking a number of our regular / irregular contributors to write about a past Newcastle United player that they liked / loved for whatever reason(s), not necessarily the best player they have ever seen.

More the fact that, this player became a big favourite of theirs, no matter what level of ability they had.

This time it is – My Newcastle United – Why I loved Gabriel Obertan.

Three words you could use to describe this player?

Really big disappointment.

I think it was when I first saw Squidward Tentacles on SpongeBob SquarePants and realised what a perfect nickname he had.

I’ve never seen anyone parodied so well by a cartoon character until we signed Mister Logic from Everton last season!

What were this player’s strengths when at Newcastle United?

The questions are getting a little harder now!

He had good ball control and pace. I first remember seeing him in a Manure European game. I can’t remember who they were playing but he absolutely terrorised them. They doubled up on him but he just left them for dead time after time. When we bought him I thought we’d got a new David Ginola in the making but it didn’t quite work out that way.

Any weaknesses?

His main weakness was his lack of confidence which resulted in his inconsistency and failure to deliver that end product.

Your favourite memories of this player?

My two favourite memories – and the reason I made this rather bizarre choice – are of the two league goals he scored during his five (yes, five!) seasons with us.

The first was on a chilly February night at Ewood Park. Me and my son were right behind the Blackburn goal when he burst through the middle, left their defence for dead and gave the keeper no chance, 2-0 and job done.

Living at that time in the heart of Blackburn territory, it gave us both immense satisfaction to be able to rub those blue and white noses in it at work and school respectively over the next few days. I was always going to love the lad for that.

The other 50% of his league goals was an even greater gift to me.

In October 2014 we were at home to Leicester City. By that time I had entered the virtual world of the Chronicle comments site and was engaged in a long-running exchange of pleasantries with the legendary Michael Caine. He was the reason I decided to join up and create a moniker – Wor Lass.

Before the game I’d predicted we’d win 1-0 and that Obertan would score the goal. I never really expected he would but I knew it would wind Michael up as he always derided the lad unmercifully. One of his favourites (applied to a variety of players over the years) being, “He couldn’t score in a brothel with a £50 note hanging out of his flies.”

Well, if he’d been in a brothel he would have come out well satisfied and £50 worse off. A 1-0 win and Gabriel Obertan the scorer. I was then able to deliver the coup de grace, “Well, Michael, that just goes to show that Wor Lass knows more about football than you!”

Michael and I ended up on very good terms and I have to say he was a big miss when he disappeared from the site.

Keeping to the spirit of the questionnaire, especially the three word answer thing, Not … A … Chance.

Now that Sandro Tonali has signed, what would that make your best available NUFC starting eleven?

Pope

Trippier

Schar

Botman

Burn

Tonali

Bruno

Willock

Almiron

Joelinton

Isak

I think that’s just about our strongest 11 and I don’t expect Eddie to mess about with formations at the start of the season.

There are good alternatives in several areas now so I expect Little Joe and Miggy especially to be sweating on their starting berth. Callum could easily start ahead of Isak – or they both could.

The form that Mr Logic has just been named player of the tournament at the Under 21 Euros would suggest that he will be pushing hard for a start as well. Plus, of course, there may well be some more quality incoming yet.

Including your choice of much loved player of the past, please give us a whole team of your much loved Newcastle United players of the past, once again, they don’t have to be the eleven best NUFC players you have ever seen play, just 11 who you really liked down the years (you can include current Newcastle players in this much loved all-time eleven).

I’m going to duck this one. I’ve never been one for working out systems and team formations to any great extent so I’m just going with my favourite people (without Gabriel Obertan…) regardless of position.

Some, like Lascelles, I like more for their character than their ability on the pitch. Having said that. I have started from defence and worked outwards:

Woodgate

Lascelles

Barton

Batty

Terry Mac

Bruno

Beardo

King Kev

Ginola